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  • #BecauseofBri

13-What just happened?!?!

Updated: Sep 10, 2020

I got to know some of the 'regulars' and talked with them in passing. Each day had new issues to overcome or small steps forward to celebrate. I couldn't wait to get there and see what each day would bring.

Only a couple of days after having her breathing tube replaced by a trachea, she was choking. I was standing by her bed holding her hand trying to comfort her plus her neuro fever was incredibly bad, she was shaking which then shook the bed to where it was moving.

Often when you 'play with the brain' it disturbs many things including your inner temperature, hence the Neuro Fever. They had to surgically put a tube around her heart that had coolant running through it and out to a big machine, to help cool her down. Along with no covers and a fan running constantly. The weather was still fairly warm outside for Fall but I had to wear a winter coat or jacket when I was in the room.

*Lennerd was actually there for his usual 2 or 3 x week, hour or so, 'visits' which usually consisted of sitting by the window on his phone unless there were other visitors in the room (besides me). I asked him if he would get the Respiratory Specialist to help Brianne since she was choking on her trachea because I wanted to stay with her. He grunted.

I was soooo shocked, I knew he heard me because he grunted but he didn't move or look up. My mind was reeling. I couldn't have imagined having that lack of empathy for even my worst enemy but most especially my spouse. This spoke volumes without saying anything.

I couple of minutes later I finally left to do it myself. After the Respiratory Specialist had worked on Brianne for about 10 minutes then *Lennerd got up from his seat, walked past Brianne and quickly patted her foot and said, "Bye Brianne".

Once Brianne was stable and I was able to let it all be absorbed, I was so stinking mad!! But I prayed to let it go, not accept it but release it because I prayed daily for heavenly help to be there to help Brianne and I believe those kind of feelings result in driving that heavenly help and angels away. But it was so very hard!

She needed all the heavenly help she could get!!

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